Too much

"And I went crazy again today, looking for a strand to climb
Looking for a little hope
Baby said he couldn't stay, wouldn't put his lips to mine,
And a fail to kiss is a fail to cope
I said, 'Honey, I don't feel so good, don't feel justified
Come on put a little love here in my void,' he said
'It's all in your head,' and I said, 'So's everything'
But he didn't get it I thought he was a man
But he was just a little boy" ~ Paper Bag, Fiona Apple 

Always there

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Every night.....they haunt

Over and over again.  I try to remember the details, I try to remember the feeling of what.....I try to make sense of what I, deep down, already know.  The reasons they haunt are well known to me but it's easier to discount them than to accept them.