I knew this time would come

"Life beats down and crushes the soul and art reminds you that you have one."  ~Stella Adler
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Before I was a photographer I was in front of the camera trying to prove something to myself.  Trying to find myself and trying to make myself feel happy about myself.  When I was not prepared to quit, I did.  I began taking photos instead.  I tried to fill the void by making art instead.  Again, I was on a mission to prove something.  The only problem with that is that you have to know what you're trying to prove to actually accomplish it.  I never found what I was working towards on a scale that would make everyone around me happy.  Instead, I felt I was always answering questions that again made me wonder what I was trying to prove.  Was I trying to prove something to them or was I trying to prove something to myself?  In the end, it makes no difference.    I am happy with my photos, I am happy when I take them, I am happy when I create art.  It's as simple as that.  


I will no longer photograph models.  I will no longer take on paid assignments unless it suits me and makes me happy.  No more stress doing what I love the most.  I will do what I love because that is all it is.  Making love with art.   
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Pick up the latest book by Nikki Sixx "This is Gonna Hurt".  If you know me, if you understand why I might get inclined to do what I love without payment, after reading the first few chapters - you will get it entirely.